Living In The Depths Of The Abyss

The day my now 44 plus years of life began to end rapidly was August 13th, 2009.
It was this night my wife of 20 years, who is also my fourth cousin who I’ve known for three decades, kidnapped my now 12 year old daughter, Hayley.

That night was the worst night of my life. I did not know where my two most loved girls were. I still do not know where the two girls I love the most are today- and it’s been over a year. I've not spoken to, or seen, my now ex wife and daughter for that length of time.

I find myself welcoming death chronically now due to the absence of my family, not to mention all tangible items I had before this attack occurred upon me by my now ex wife, Molly, which I no longer have now. I am now a man without anything or anyone presently. This total and complete loss I continue to experience is inconceivable.

The next day became worse than the night I had just experienced in middle August of 2009.

Three police cars arrived at the front of my two story house that afternoon- as I was returning from a long bicycle ride. Immediately, I thought my wife Molly or my daughter, whose name is Hayley, were somehow harmed. Instead, this army of rural police wanted me, quite clearly.

I was served by them a restraining order requested by my wife, who that day went to the St Charles country court in Missouri Molly, my ex wife now,claimed that I violently abused her the night before this occured. I was given seconds to vacate my own home at that time by this army of law enforcers.

I was treated by these police members as actually being a violent individual. Shock is an understatement for how I felt then, as I continue to feel now. Anyone who knows me is aware that I’m a very non- violent, and non- abusive, individual.
At that time I left my own house by force,I became homeless due to these meritless actions by Molly and her free legal team.

Molly moved in immediately, and with a significant amount of our furniture, including my daughter’s furniture and items, into another girl’s house. This new roommate of my wife and daughter did similar actions against her own husband years ago. This other girl was a member of the army my ex wife recruited to completely destroy me.

Myself discovering this loss of items in our house in fact violated this insane restraining order issued against me, which again was clearly was planned and thought out by Molly, and other women she recruited as mean and angry as Molly is now.

Restraining orders of this psychotic nature are easily violated, I learned. For trying to gently reconcile with Molly days after the restraining order was issued against me, I spent 41 days in jail- starting in the beginning of September of last year. This was my first time ever incarcerated.

The St. Charles County, Missouri jail is owned by three judges there. My rights were never taken into consideration at any time. Molly kidnapped our daughter the night before the restraining order, and this fact was never considered in my prosecution.

What likely extended my stay in jail was the fact that I wrote Hayley while I was in jail often, in order to stabilize her emotionally, as well as myself. These letters were mailed to Hayley at Molly’s parent’s house. Hayley wrote me back when I was in jail then as well.

I don’t care about these laws against me now, and I didn't care then, when I was jailed for well over a month.

My daughter comes above any law that exists in this toxic family law system in the United States, as well as other countries, I'm sorry to say.

So as I've said, Molly captured and sold all joint and individual assets in her possession when I was in jail. She also contacted all who know me, and convinced them somehow I was in jail for violently abusing her. As a reminder, I was in jail for violating the restraining order. When I was released from jail, my possessions were very minimal. That is to say, I basically only had the clothes on my back at the time.

Judge Cundiff was the judge who handled my case.

When I made this mistake of pleading out my case in order to leave jail in mid October of last year while in jail, I was assigned a probation officer named Tina Rowland for two years.

Tina was about my age, no children, and not married, as I recall. She would smile when I would share my trauma with her during my mandatory weekly visits with Tina. Tina’s disposition towards me during those very few visits with her were overtly abusive.

Weeks after I was released from jail, and faced with Tina, a warrant was issued for my arrest once again. This was mid November of 2009. I don’t know what this warrant was for specifically, but I know I did nothing wrong.

It was at this time I left the state of Missouri, and moved to Atlanta, Georgia by bus. A girlfriend I had 25 years ago lives near Atlanta, and she wanted me to stay with her, as we had been speaking often at that time. She paid for my bus ride to be with her.

Staying with this girlfriend lasted about 6 months.

I told this girl from the very start that my emotions are shot, and I still had a multiple drug problem- that was in fact fueled by Molly for years. So I told her I am quite unstable.

This girlfriend eventually learned I did in fact possess some serious intrinsic problems, and I do still.

In order to salvage what remains of me due to my now ex wife’s desire to destroy me, I voluntarily entered drug and alcohol rehabilitation with the Veterans Administration in April of this year. This was also the month I was served divorce papers by Molly’s free legal team here in the Atlanta area.

The divorce dictates that Molly has sole custody of our daughter Hayley, and that anytime I may see Hayley, child protective services has to be present. This is due to what is called the precautionary principle. This principle means that, because another accused me of being violent, I’m somehow prone to being a violent human being.

There are numerous behavioral traits associated with a violent, or potentially violent, individual. I am void of such traits, yet these traits were never considered in this prosecution that continues against me.

No assessment of me was ever made by Molly’s free legal army now assigned to her, or the abusive court, which receives nationwide hundreds of millions of dollars yearly, due to federal grants from the violence against womens act, initiated in the year 1994.

So I entered drug and alcohol rehabilitation after trying to commit suicide with powerful drugs prescribed to me in March of this year.

And it was in June of this year that this Atlanta girlfriend understandably ended our relationship-days after I started my drug and alcohol rehabilitation.

I remain presently with the Veterans Administration and their homeless program now, as I continue with my recovery from my drug abuse, and mental atrophy due to the actions of my ex wife, Molly.

Since this nightmare entered my life now over a year ago, others from all walks of life have suggested that I should be angry or hateful towards Molly- due to what she has done to me. They have insisted acquiring such emotions would be good for me, somehow. Yet I remain void of such emotions to this day.

I seek to understand how my wife of so long could have done such a surprise and invalid attack on me, after Molly conspired with other females as unstable as Molly clearly is. Nor do I seek revenge against Molly, for what she has done to my life. I seek to understand her motives, and the etiologies for why she destroyed our family and myself.

I'm concerned about the safety of my daughter Hayley always now, due to the aggressive nature of her mother.

At this time, I’ve applied for disability via social security, due to the severe psychological trauma inflicted upon me with deliberate intent by my now estranged wife, Molly. My future is far from hopeful.

I remain broke, homeless, and unemployed. In many ways, I’m largely dysfunctional, or unfunctional.

I remain with a strong desire to somehow mend the damage Molly has done to me, and others close to me. I was close with Molly’s parents for a period spanning three decades, for example.

Some say that this desire of mine is unreasonable. Most consider me a fool for having such impossible goals, such as achieving needed peace with those I continue to love. Some say I will not speak or see my daughter for years to come.

Perhaps they are right.

Perhaps.